(bonus points if you can finish this poetic sentence)
A recent home school conversation went like this:
Daughter: Mom! Want me to decorate for Fall?
Mom: Sure. When it's Fall.
Daughter: I know it's not until October, but it would be fun to start.
Mom: You know that the Autumnal equinox is in September, right? ( Showing her on my phone) See? It's September 22nd.
Daughter: Yeah, I know, but that's not Fall. Fall is on October.
(Mom then looks around to see if anyone of importance overheard and then makes a mental note to begin school earlier this year.)
Happy "ALMOST Fall" Friday Friends.
How's that Summer schedule going?
Or lack of schedule going, I should ask.
Anyone else like me ready for earlier wake-up times, containers brimming with sharpened pencils, new boxes of Puffs-Plus Kleenex and of course a new daily planner that will change the course of history?
Did I ever tell you about the planner debacle of '24?
No? Well hang on to your highlighters then.
Last year I truly thought it was my year to get this life of mine in line.
I bought the "costs-an-arm-and-a-very-large-leg-and-will-for-sure-guilt-me-into-actually-using-this-thing," planner with all the "bells and whistles."
You know the one.
The one that comes in such an ornate box that for one shining moment it makes you feel like the Queen of England opening that iconic red box with all of your government correspondence in it.
AND cute birthday stickers.
THAT one.
The one that comes out mid-Summer for the NEXT year's covers that are really only a titch different flower and pastel pattern making you think that you need this kind of hype in your life but in reality it's the same ABEKA History book with a few new fonts and cover.
Die-hard home schoolers will get that last bit.
Hortons, we see you. Those '99 editions still slap.
ANNNNNNNNYYYYYYWAAAAYYYYY....
I got the planner and I PLANNED to use it.
See what I did there?
I took it to the first ever meeting of the Pastor's wife and deacon's wives and even used different colored pens.
I scheduled special dates and speakers and family nights.
If there was a 32nd chapter in Proverbs, (cough, cough,) it would've had my name all over it.
And then I did what any normal wife and mother does.
I completely forgot about it.
Until I remembered MANY moons later that I was supposed to be organizing my life.
I didn't want to let on at home that I was frantically looking for my life planner so I just nonchalantly asked my teenager if she had seen it, you know, just lying around for me to re-pencil something.
Without even looking up from what she was doing she told me that she thought she saw it a few MONTHS ago in the church LOST AND FOUND.
I believe at this moment my eyebrows began to twitch.
The LOST AND FOUND?????
The table that my husband hates to see at the back of the foyer every so often filled with old dress shoes, suit coats and who knows what????
The table that gets one swift kick into the DUMPSTER after three or four fair warnings from the pulpit????
Of course I had to ask her, why on God's green earth, if she saw my planner there did she not, like a responsible daughter, grab it for her mother who feeds and clothes her?
No response.
My eyebrows called for another attempt at an explanation.
With the carelessness of teenage life oblivious of both responsibility and discernment she glanced over her shoulder and had the audacity to say,
"Well don't worry, I'm sure someone from church took it."
There are no Bible college classes that teach you what to do when you're supposed to be an organized Pastor's wife and you loose your planner to another church member.
Pray it comes back to you? Pray they see all that you have on your plate and pray for you more? Slip you a Dunkin' card? Pray they come and HELP you DO all the things?
Someone on these fancy websites should at least have a section entitled: "How to plan when you can't for the life of you LOCATE your planner."
It is at this very moment that I decide to go down to church and search for myself hoping that some sweet soul saw it, had pity on me and actually gave me something to look for in my cobweb-crusted mailbox slot.
And while I was peeking under chairs and such the dear Pastor himself sees me looking around and asks what I'm searching for annnnnnd with a heart of humble-pie I divulge the whole thing.
And guess what?
He tells me that he walked by afore mentioned grody table and thought to himself, "Wow. this is fancy planner. Wonder who it belongs to?"
My husband who knows how many blue skirts I have wasn't even aware that I OWNED a PLANNER.
At this point I was just ready for an altar call.
From my husband.
He then told me he opened it and saw my handwriting.
I hope it looked like expensive cursive.
This dear man who promised to love and cherish me, apparently also promised to snatch my planners from the table of doom.
I know that somewhere in my crazy brain there's some spiritual humor in the fact that the planner was lost AND found again at the church.
By the PASTOR no less.
I was just glad to get it again and make sure it sits undisturbed on my dresser.
You know, where I can dust it and use it as a very expensive tea coaster.
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